Ever get blamed for something you didn't do?

Updated: Dec 27, 2020

I despise being blamed for something I didn't do. It used to fill with anger. But not anymore! I strengthened my ability to control my responses with the clicker!

Backstory: My mother had/has a need to find someone to blame for EVERY thing! Someone has to be at fault for whatever went wrong or missing. While growing up... that someone was me. And it would infuriate me. Sure, sometimes I deserved it but often I didn't. And even if the item magically appeared and it was obvious I had nothing to do with the disappearance... there was no apology. Just me left feeling hurt and disrespected.

Fast forward 30 years, I got blamed for deleting a large portion of an important document on a shared google docs. Even after I emphatically explained that it wasn't me, the suggestion came that I watch some tutorials on google docs' best practices. I could feel the rage churning within me. I wanted to yell: "Stop fucking blaming me for shit I din't do!" But instead I kept calm, thanks to Mr. Clicker reminding me that I enjoy staying peaceful and loving, even when I'm being blamed.

Instead of yelling, I calmly stated "I don't like being blamed for something I didn't do. I will always admit when I am at fault. I simply am not at fault here. Please stop blaming me." The person instantly picked up the phone and apologized for accusing me. I was SO happy I din't loose my shit on them.

I am writing this to share that you can create this reflex too! You can control your reactions to life's annoyances and to the dysfunctional human behaviors you will experience every day. You don't have to allow your programming of how to handle being blamed when undeserved take you away from staying connected to who you are... centered and peaceful. You can handle situations with so much more grace.

Please join The Clicker Club to learn how. You will gain control of your responses and stop getting upset with the world and yourself. How liberating would that be?!

Sending lots of love,

Dr. Nikki

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